It is so easy to disqualify ourselves. We look around and see people with shiny hair, super white teeth, smart looking clothes and loads of confidence, and assume they know what they are doing. We assume they have the info and we are on the outside looking in. Why is that? After traveling the world, meeting people in every segment of society from US Attorney Generals to homeless beggars on the streets of Brazil, can I tell you something? Despite how it may appear, nobody knows what they are doing. Now, let me explain why that is wonderful!
I have seen so many people quit before they experienced a breakthrough, before the relationship got going in the right direction or before the business took off. For many, the reason was they felt like a failure. They assumed they were ruining everything and that someone else with more moxie, more training, more personality, better breath, (or whatever!) would do a better job. Now, surely there are people with gifts and talents we do not possess and having their abilities would maybe make our job easier. However, that is not to suggest we are the wrong person for the job. (Click here to read “Learn To Love Your Limits”)
I Am Such A Screw-Up
We are often our own worst critics. We constantly see our inconsistencies and are reminded of our flaws. In turn, we often only see the parts of other people they want us to see, or that we choose to see because of our over-inflated opinion of them. That imbalance will always cause us to think others know what they are doing and that we do not. The truth is, they are not sure of a great many things. They are trying their best or at least trying to “fake it ‘till they make it” and you are simply enamored with their cool websites or expensive shoes. News flash: that doesn’t mean they know what they are doing!
As long as we try to live our lives on our own, without the leadership of the Lord Jesus, and without humbly submitting to a community of people who can help us live a whole and fulfilling life, we will feel an emptiness and awareness of our lack on a spiritual level. The only solution to that is to humble ourselves before God and others, and invite Him into our lives; allowing the community of other believers to encourage and challenge us in our growth. But even after we do that it is possible to discount our ability or effectiveness. (Click here to read “What Is Your Response Ability” )
So let me encourage you today. There are a great many people who have learned a great many things. They have overcome incredible obstacles and have amassed unbelievable wisdom and insight that we should glean from. However, that does not mean they are experts in every area of life or that they even feel confident in the thing you admire about them. It just means they have lived some life and have some stories to tell. That is incredibly beautiful and valuable but it isn’t the golden ticket. I will say it again with absolute confidence: nobody knows what they are doing.
We Are All Just Trying Our Best
The next time you see someone excelling in something or you admire an individual for their talent or temperament, recognize that wonderful quality while understanding there is more to the story. Seldom are people as wonderful or as horrible as we expect. The truth is, we all have a lot to offer and we all have a lot of fears and concerns. Do not be afraid to glean from others. That is the beauty of shared experience and life-giving community! However, in gleaning from others do not rubber stamp them as the gold standard of life and definitely do not discount yourself.
None of us have lived this day yet. None of us know exactly what is going to happen after reading this sentence. Therefore, none of us know what to expect, how to act, or what to do! We are all just trying our best. As you allow yourself to be lead by the Holy Spirit, you will find great joy and peace in the journey. However, do not let that joy be diminished by comparing yourself to others, downplaying your unique gifts, or by putting others on a pedestal they cannot afford to occupy. (Click here to read about “Vain Imaginations”)
Nobody knows what they are doing but the good news is none of us have to know. God never said, “thou must knoweth what thou art doing at all times!” He does, however, tell us to trust Him, obey His Word, and ask for His leadership in every area of our lives. As we do that, the pressure comes off of our shoulders and we are able to be lead by a loving God who is for us and not against us.
From The Bible
A person’s steps are directed by the LORD. How then can anyone understand their own way? – Proverbs 20:24 NIV
Trust in the LORD with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take. – Proverbs 3:5-6 NLT
Don’t think you are better than you really are. Be honest in your evaluation of yourselves, measuring yourselves by the faith God has given us. – Romans 12:3b NLT