Focus is an important part of life and work. We are never able to accomplish anything whether it’s cleaning our rooms or building an organization unless we can focus. But is it possible to get too focused? When does productivity in one area start to lead to erosion in another? I think it happens more often than we like to admit. But what are we supposed to do?
Let me create a hypothetical, yet familiar scenario. A young couple wants to start a family. What a beautiful goal?! The young man gets super focused on his career and the family finances in order to provide a stable environment for his family. The young lady gets super focused on their home and their newborn child. These are wonderful things and worthy pursuits! However, as all too often happens, both can quickly forget they have more than one goal. Yes, they want enough resources to have a safe and stable home for their family and yes, this little one needs a lot of attention and a safe, clean environment but they also want a good marriage. In truth, they also want strong friendships, a healthy lifestyle, and time to relax and enjoy life. But how are you supposed to do it all? While I don’t claim to have all the answers I will say it starts with remembering you have more than one goal. (Read my post Fall In Love With What You Have)
Our culture celebrates concepts like “can’t stop won’t stop” and “go all in” which, in theory, are good motivators to apply yourself at something and work hard. Great qualities. Just not “one size fits all” approaches to life. There are certainly times when aspects of life will demand more from us than others. But that is all the more reason to remember you have more than one goal. Don’t sabotage the health of your marriage for the sake of accomplishing a financial goal. And don’t lose your job because you have gotten really excited about playing pickelball!
When In Tension Be Intentional
So how do you find the balance or manage the tension? First, you must recognize the world around you isn’t going to help you much. President Woodrow Wilson once said, “The man who is swimming against the stream knows the strength of it.” If we’re going to live our lives with a healthy balance of priorities and manage the tensions of pursuing ambitions while not losing our souls, we are going to have to become increasingly intentional. Work hard within the predefined pockets of time you have carved out for that hard work. Then stop and pick it up later. Is that easy? No, but it’s intentional.
When the time comes to really ramp up in a certain area, have a talk with your spouse or friends or parents (depending on your context) and communicate the situation and your desire to really push in a certain area. At least that way there can be buy-in from other parties and a timeframe can be placed on the big push. Most relationships can handle seasons of hard work when it’s clearly defined on the front end that it is for a predefined season, and not forever. (Read my post What You Focus On Draws You In)
Focus, Just Don’t Forget us
Arnold Glasow said, “A true friend never gets in your way unless you happen to be going down.” We all need a true friend to keep us from running off the rails in crazy pursuit of that ONE THING we want in life. Because, the truth is, you don’t want only ONE THING. So be intentional, communicate your desires, and get consensus on when you’re going to push hard in an area for a season so there is accountability. That way, when you finally accomplish the goal there will be a family there to enjoy it with you when you’re done or when you climb the mountain you won’t have to find a new set of friends to help you get down!
Focus is good. Hyper-focus is often detrimental. Remember, you have more than one goal. The next time you get super excited about a pursuit, write it down on a sheet of paper and write around it the names of your other pursuits including your relationships with your spouse, children and friends. Include important hobbies or healthy habits you are wanting to maintain and, most importantly, the time and efforts you invest into your relationship with God on that same paper. Then, ask God to show you how to set your priorities so that you will be intentional with your pursuits. If you’re going to need to cut back to one day a week at the gym for a season, or to not start a new project just yet, choose that on purpose instead of trying to do it all. It may cause you to reach your goals a bit slower than you could have, but you’ll likely have a healthier life in and through the process. (Read my post Relationships Aren’t Efficient)
Let’s purpose to live with intention and accomplish all God has in His heart for us today and always. God is for you today and so am I.
From The Bible
Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil. Therefore, do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is. – Ephesians 5:15-17 ESV
The plans of the diligent lead surely to abundance, but everyone who is hasty comes only to poverty. – Proverbs 21:5 ESV
And the Lord answered me: “Write the vision; make it plain on tablets, so he may run who reads it. For still the vision awaits its appointed time; it hastens to the end—it will not lie. If it seems slow, wait for it; it will surely come; it will not delay. – Habakkuk 2:2-3 ESV